The Productivity of Slowing Down
Years ago, I worked as a graphic designer at a resource centre that I cared very deeply about. It was my first time working for a non-profit and my first time working for any Indigenous-led organization so I felt a particular sense of responsibility beyond any other job that I had before. It was also my first role as a full-time graphic designer - a graphic designer without a formal graphic or multimedia background - and I felt like I had a lot to make up for and a lot to prove (the imposter syndrome was ripe).
In my free time, thanks to some of my coworkers at the centre, I had also started running. What started as a 5K for my work’s relay team at the Manitoba Marathon quickly grew into regular training runs for more 5Ks, 10Ks, and eventually a half marathon. That spring, I was especially excited for a less serious race, the Mud Run, which would include obstacles, mud pits, and short spurts of running on an upcoming Saturday morning.
The week before the race was a frantic one. Spring was also annual report season at the centre and with an organization of 100+ staff all reporting on their yearly activities, it was never a smooth or timely process. By the time the content made its way to design, it was already the end of the week… and the annual general meeting was on Tuesday.
I worked late into the night, but the length of the report was too substantial to finish in a single day and I knew to have the report designed, proofed, and printed for early the next week would mean a full weekend. I would need to miss the Mud Run.
I had a lot of big feelings that weekend, but I did what I felt I needed to do. I skipped the Mud Run, I worked from home into Friday evening and spent most of Saturday and Sunday at the office. I got it done. It might have been at my own expense, but I got it done (and it looked pretty fucking good btw).
Looking back, that weekend might have been the first time I gave up part of myself for work, but it definitely wasn’t the last. Over the years, I’ve had the privilege of working with more Indigenous-led organizations doing amazing heart work out in the community and I can tell you that the sense of responsibility that comes with showing up in this work still weighs heavy. But, the resulting exhaustion and burnout of not taking care of yourself first always weighs heavier.
If I could do it again, I would do the Mud Run. I still would have worked a hell of a lot of overtime that weekend, but I would give myself that break on Saturday morning to play and refill my cup before diving back into work.
While it felt like too big of risk back then, I now know the power and productivity of slowing down to fill your cup. If I had allowed myself that half-day break, I would have shown up back at work with less stress, less frustration, and less bitterness. I would have held a boundary demonstrating to myself that I am worthy of rest and play that would have benefitted me far beyond my work habits. I would have given myself a real break (rather than tv or scrolling breaks) and come back to the work with fresh eyes and a full heart.
Since then, I’ve learned to take these moments away from work more seriously. I’m learning (and failing some weeks). I still work long hours when I feel that deep sense of responsibility weighing, and still push myself to my limits many weeks. But, through those long days, I’ve also been cultivating more slowness and loosening my ties to the sense of urgency that comes from capitalism and productivity culture.
It isn’t an easy journey, but it is one worth taking and I hope you will consider joining me in this practice. Below are some of my more (and sometimes less) successful habits that I’m currently cultivating:
Time Tracking: Visual proof of when I’m slipping into old patterns
Time Blocking in Calendar
Weekly focus blocks (no meetings allowed!)
Recurring rest/break blocks including full lunch daily
Scheduling movement blocks at start of week
Scheduling a 30 min daily closing block in my calendar to end each work day
Limiting quantity of meetings each day
Off the Hour Meetings (45 min meetings, starting or ending 10-15 min after/before top of the hour to allow for breaks between meetings)
As always, take away what resonates with you and leave the rest. If you have tips that have worked for you on this journey, drop them in the comments below or connect with me on socials.
